So, this was sent to me by Steve, my neighbor, in response to the post I wrote on Lou Dobb's article on May 24, 2006. It's pretty humorous and since he can't post it (being limited by his Crackberry, er Blackberry), I've cut and pasted it from the email that he sent me.
"...I just got this e-mail forwarded to me yesterday. It is a form letter people can send to their senators (unfortunately, I don't have any senators). Check it out..."
The Honorable Whoever
309 Hart Senate Office Building
Washington DC, 20510
Dear Senator Whoever,
As a native Wherever and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the Immigration and Naturalization Service in an effort to determine the process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
My reasons for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years, what I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes for three of the last five years.
I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two years of the last five years taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent return for me and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005 and I estimated a gross savings approximating $72,000. After the fine this would yield me a net savings of $70,000.
In addition, I would reap the other benefits of being an illegal alien such as free healthcare, avoidance of paying Social Security taxes, buying automobile insurance, serving on jury panels, etc.
If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.
Your Loyal Constituent,
Any thoughts?
4 comments:
Well - think the paper work would take longer than the 2 years and two months that Dubya has left! Thank Steve for sharing!
Forgot to say how lucky you were when you were at the airport and the man came up to you and claimed his name was Ashley that you didn't look in each others eyes and find out you were soul mates. That is the way Janis and Robert met!!!
haha. really? at the airport? was she holding a sign with his name on it?
sad, but true. we pay all our taxes, and get no breaks with insurance. it sure sucks that people who break the law can get away with it. it is a hard decision to make, and there really is no fair result. if i think about the parents at my school who might have illegally immigrated years ago, i would hate to see them punished. but, something does need to be done! glad i'm not the one who has to decide. -kristina
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